Mercenary Justice

By Baba Galleh Jallow


Magistrate Agibipo Honolulu sat there, his chin on his palms, his elbows on 
the large mahogany desk. He stared below at the defense counsel as the 
lawyer listed the various reasons why his client should be granted bail. 
Magistrate Honolulu did not really hear what the defense counsel was saying. 
All he needed to know was that counsel was applying for bail. The rest, as 
far as he was concerned, was of little consequence to him because he was no 
position to grant or refuse bail. He was there to do whatever it was the 
powers that be wanted him to do with any accused person brought before his 
court. So Magistrate Agibipo Honolulu, bored to death, just sat there and 
day-dreamed as counsel for the defense ranted on about constitutional rights 
etc etc.

Suddenly aware that counsel for the defense had finished ranting about 
constitutional rights and the right to be presumed innocent until proven 
guilty and similar nonsense, the magistrate ordered silence and announced 
that this court would take a brief recess in order to consider the matter of 
the defense counsel’s application for bail.

Back in his office, Magistrate Agibipo Honolulu picked up his phone and 
dialed. Some one picked up the phone.

“Hello. This is Magistrate Honolulu, trying a case under the orders of His 
Excellency the President. I would like to speak to His Excellency please. He 
said to call him with any questions.”

Magistrate Honolulu was put on hold. For twenty long minutes, he sat there 
holding the receiver in his sweating palm to his sweating ear. He felt 
sleepy but dared not so much as move lest His Excellency comes to the line. 
He wanted to take a leak but dared not move. He pressed his legs together to 
prevent the pee from licking out. He was in such a hurry to get His 
Excellency on the line that he had forgotten to use the bathroom before 
calling. Now he was paying for his stupid mistake. He had been made to hold 
the line for up to one hour or more before and if that happened today, he 
would have no option but to let it go and change into his other gown. He had 
done it before and found himself in a serious quandary. That is why he 
always brought an extra gown with him to the court and kept it in his 
drawer, just in case. He hated this stupid case because unlike the others, 
he had received no specific orders at to what to do. Often he was told jail 
him for ten, fifteen, twenty years, for life, as the case might be. Or he 
was just told, kill him. Then he knew exactly what to do. But on this one, 
His Excellency had not issued any court order to follow. And so he had to 
call to make sure because he did not want to do anything stupid. One never 
knows with the Big Oga. Better to be sure than sorry. And so he pressed his 
thighs together and held on to the line for dear life.

After twenty long minutes, Magistrate Honolulu jumped in his seat when the 
unmistakable voice of His Excellency suddenly boomed into his buzzing head.

“Yes?”

“Eh Your Excellency, Magistrate Honolulu here. Sorry to interrupt your busy 
schedule sir. Hope your day is going well sir.”

Magistrate Agibipo Honolulu had almost forgotten what he had called the 
president about. Beads of sweat ran down his face as he tried frantically to 
remember.

“Yes? What do you want?”

“Yes sir Your Excellency. You know we are always here to serve you sir and 
sometimes we hate to disturb your busy schedule sir.”

“Look you better tell me why you called. Don’t you know that as head of 
state I have other important things to do?”

“Oh yes sir please accept my apologies sir. Eh - it’s about Mr. X sir. His 
lawyer is applying for bail and making a lot of noise about the constitution 
sir. But for me what is important is what Your Excellency wants me to do 
sir.”

“So why did you call then?” His Excellency sounded miffed, and that was not 
a good sign.

“Just to know what Your Excellency wants me to do sir because this lawyer is 
making a lot of noise in my court about bail and stuff sir.”

“You want to tell me that you don’t know what I expect you to do? If that is 
the case you better prepare to go back to your country. I have no time for 
this.”

“It’s not that Your Excellency sir . . .”

The line went dead. Magistrate Honolulu froze in mid sentence. His 
Excellency had loudly banged the phone on his ears and left him with the 
mournful drone of a dead line. Magistrate Honolulu was sweating profusely 
and shaking from head to toes. He had forgotten all about wanting to pee. He 
grabbed a kerchief and wiped his drenched face and neck. Clumsily placing 
down the receiver, he struggled to compose himself well enough to go back 
into the courtroom. He cursed himself for his stupidity. He was simply 
trying to please the Big Oga and look what he has done to himself. The 
thought that he might be fired and sent back to his native country to become 
just another face among the crowds of uneducated tricksters was too terrible 
to contemplate. He could never go through the same shit he had endured 
before receiving the support he needed to get on the list of interested 
candidates for magistracy in this country. He winced at the memory of the 
extreme humiliation he felt working as a pimp for corrupt politicians, 
cleaning the offices and toilets of useful contacts, sometimes being forced 
to bend down and get injected with streams of slimy rot. No, he would die if 
he was fired from that position. He would rather die. But maybe if he did 
the right thing today . . .

Back in the courtroom, a loud murmur arose from the audience as a 
stone-faced Magistrate Agibipo Honolulu surfaced after what seemed like a 
century. He wasted no time in declaring the outcome of his reflection on the 
propriety of granting bail to the accused. As soon as order returned to the 
court, he announced his decision.

“After due consideration of the complexities involved in this very important 
case, I recognize that the accused has a right to bail according to the 
constitution and laws of this land,” he announced, pausing for dramatic 
effect as smiles lightened up the faces of the accused, the defense counsel, 
and the family and friends of the accused.

“However,” Magistrate Honolulu declared, “because the defendant was a 
responsible public official, the defense counsel’s application for bail is 
hereby denied. The defendant is hereby ordered back to remand custody. This 
case is now adjourned indefinitely until further notice.”

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