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A WORLD OF CIVILITY
15 Ways to Wage Kindness Starting Now

   by Tom Terez

What in the world is happening? Just several years old, the 21st
Century is already making history as a time of raging division,
self-interest, suspicion, incivility, and violence. Surely we can do
better. We MUST do better. But how?

Directly below are 15 answers. These action-oriented aspirations
are all about bringing compassion, empathy, and civility back to
life -- in our workplaces, communities, and beyond.

Gandhi had it right: We must be the change we wish to see in the
world. It's up to you.

1. Treat each person as if he or she is God. That reckless driver
who cuts you off on the highway? God. That telemarketer who
calls three times in a row? God. That store clerk who keeps you
waiting? God.

2. Recognize the divine within yourself. You have the power to
love, to do good, to create, to effect remarkable positive
change. It's the ultimate gift -- and responsibility.

3. Leverage the power of one. There's a reason it's called the
universe and not the multiverse. What happens to one of us
affects all of us, to such a degree that small acts of kindness
really can change the world.

4. When the other "side" seems irredeemable, uncover what you
have in common. That's right, you DO have common ground,
beneath all the misconceptions and stereotypes: common
principles, experiences, priorities, and more. Work from there
and you'll make progress together.

5. Promote "power with" instead of "power over." One is about
people wanting to, the other is about people having to. One is
about influence, the other is about control. One is about
effectiveness, the other is about efficiency. One succeeds over
the long term, the other doesn't.

6. Assume the best about people. Most of them wake up wanting
to have a good day. They go to work wanting to do a good job.
They strive to be good family members, neighbors, and citizens.
If you insist on "catching" people, then catch them doing
something positive.

7. When someone attacks you, stay away from their low road.
Take a deep breath, engage in a strategic pause, and decide how
best to respond. (For more guidance, see #1 above.)

8. Stand tall against injustice. There's a lot of it out there:
prejudice, intolerance, hate. When you hear it or see it, rise up
and be a loud voice for what's right.

9. Put integrity ahead of loyalty. Who cares if it's your best
friend, or your boss, or some big-titled leader? If they want to
drive over the moral cliff, you don't have to go with them.

10. Talk less and listen more. The word "discuss" literally means
"to shake or break apart." Strive instead for dialogue, which
gathers other perspectives and forms a new understanding that
is better than any one viewpoint.

11. Say what you mean, and mean what you say. It takes
tremendous self-understanding and a load of courage, but
there's no substitute for authentic communication.

12. Honor and learn from the youngest and oldest. Children are
models of creativity, possibility, and unconditional love. Our
elders are rich with experience and wisdom. Follow their lead.

13. Build your own bridge to another culture. There are so many
ways: visit a foreign country, learn a second language, host an
exchange student, organize an exchange program. With the
Internet at our fingertips and air travel so accessible, we can
all be citizen ambassadors.

14. Don't wait -- act now! Every day brings new opportunities
to turn civility into action. Hold open a door. Greet a stranger.
Check on an ailing neighbor. Help a work colleague. Give extra
time to a friend in need. Each act of kindness brightens the
present and creates a better future.

15. When in doubt, return to #1.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:  Tom Terez is a speaker, workshop leader,
and author of the book "22 Keys to Creating a Meaningful
Workplace." His Web site, http://BetterWorkplaceNow.com,
is filled with tools for building a great work environment.
Write to [log in to unmask] or call 614-571-9529.

Copyright 2004 by Tom Terez. All rights reserved.

   This article is on the Web at:    
   http://BetterWorkplaceNow.com/world

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