Marriasse. Or is it Marriaage.? Galleh I think you're crazy. We're only
jovialising Suntou. Ok? Friggin Take it easy and let us improve ourselves
together. I figure that is the value of community. Where's Maria Del Sol? Oh she's
with Ehud Barak today. She has a standing appointment with Mahmoud Abbas.
She'll make that appointment. Trust me.
Thanx again Galleh. I've figured out Dr. Choot Choot is Suntou and Yero all
rolled into one.
Masoud. MQDT. Darbo. Oh and our own Ginny Schminny. Al Mu'Umin.
In a message dated 12/26/2007 1:08:55 P.M. Mountain Standard Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:
Realistic Guy - Part Two
By Baba Galleh Jallow
Dr. Choot Choot Hapati was an equal opportunity equalizer par excellence. No
tree was too high to climb, no mountain too steep to scale, no river too
deep to jump, and no head too elevated to knock if and when necessary. For
him, all things are created equal and so much be treated equally. He
recognized no superior virtues and entertained no higher thoughts for any
single being. “To be a realistic guy,” he would tell our common townsfolk,
“you have to able to stand shoulder to shoulder with any human being, even
though he may be taller than you. And to be realistic guy, you have to show
that you know what anybody knows, even when they have read more books or
traveled more roads than you. That is one of the cardinal principles of my
infallible philosophy of Lestek.”
It was part of Dr. Choot Choot’s philosophy of Lestek that he was no
respecter of persons who pretended to be wise or liked to show that they
were educated by talking too much about issues that were, as far as he was
concerned, very simple. Why should anyone consider themselves less endowed
than others? Why should anyone give other people greater respect than they
give themselves? Why should anyone place somebody else on a high pedestal
while they remained down low below? Such behavior was definitely unrealistic
and unworthy of his learned self. And he had the perfect plan for dealing
with such persons if conditions become, as he would call it, “rather
squatty.”
“When conditions are rather squatty,” he would tell our amazed townsfolk,
“there is a simple way of dealing with it: you simply squat and gape and
wear an expression of great awe and wonder and pretend that the other person
is sitting high on up and you are down low below. The important thing is
that in your mind, in your own unique mind of minds, you are standing neck
to neck or even above the neck of that person who pretends to be better than
you. This is part of the reason why I told you about the capacity to be
everywhere AT THE SAME TIME – just one part, mind you; just one tiny part.”
As the dynamic force of this powerful insight hit their dazzled minds, our
common townsfolk would open their mouths and gasp for air and let out long
streams of Ahaaaa, nnnnnn, unhu, unhu, accompanied by slow and somber nods
which made their heads bop like a fleet of black buoys floating on the
distant sea waves. Thus encouraged, Dr. Choot Choot Hapati would go right on
ahead with his great lecture.
“Ahhh,” he would sigh. “You guys don’t even know what it means to be
realistic. But one thing you must know: you must be able to say one thing
and mean quite another. You must be able to talk about rats while you mean
hippos, and talk about hippos while you mean rats. You have to have what I
would call a realistic mind. Aah! What does it matter anyways? If the hippo
thinks you mean the rat and the rat thinks you mean the hippo who emerges
the winner? Is it not you – YOU – the realistic guy? Which is also part of
the art of being everywhere AT THE SAME TIME. See? The pieces of my
realistic philosophy of Lestek are beginning to fall into place, if you see
what I mean.” At this point, our common townsfolk would be so impressed with
the mental prowess of our good doctor that some of them would jump up and do
a few steps and tap him on the back and call him master and cool eye. For
when he was thus engrossed in expounding the complicated yet simple tenets
of his realistic philosophy of Lestek, the eyes of our great Dr. Choot Choot
Hapati would grow wide and cool, and sparkle red with the wine of ancient
wisdom mingled with the light of great book learning that was his most
conspicuous attribute. For Dr. Choot Choot was a great darling of Bacchus,
the Greek god of wine, although that was one realistic piece of information
he would never let anyone share. “My love affair with Bacchus,” he always
said to himself, “is a realistic affair that must be kept realistically
hidden from the unrealistic eyes of the world.”
And when situations get rather squatty, Dr. Choot Choot Hapati knew just the
trick to play to avoid the unrealistic eyes of jealous midgets seeing his
great love for Bacchus: he would squat several feet away from the hippo rat,
hopping from one spot to the other, always making sure that he was on the
direction of the blowing wind, so that no one would smell the magic whiff of
Bacchus that surrounded his person. And no, his wide and starry cool eyes
never gave him away because people always knew that was the light of wisdom
and modern book learning. At such realistic moments, Dr. Choot Choot Hapati
would wear a kind and humble look in his eyes, his thoughtful head tilted
this way or that, his arms humbly clasped together, humbly nodding and
groaning, asking one gentle question after another. But in his great mind of
minds, he was always standing neck to neck with whoever thought that he was
anywhere above him. No one – and he meant NO ONE – could ever be allowed to
stand taller than the great Dr. Choot Choot Hapati of Lestek fame. Why?
Well, simply because he was a realistic guy. “Nyakadisse?” he would say.
“Lestek.”
_________________________________________________________________
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