Modesty: An article of Faith.

Modesty is a virtue the Prophet (peace be upon him) was
keen to stress.Indeed it is a universally acclaimed virtue,
with most religions and traditions praising it.However,
Western societies sometimes try to cast an air of
disapproval on modesty, picturing it as a weakness that
inhibit a person from claiming what is due to him. Instead,
they emphasize the need to be assertive so that others do
not take advantage of our modesty.

This is a wrong view of looking at things. Being modest in
social dealings does not mean that a person should abandon
what is rightfully his or hers. Modesty is the opposite of
boasting and asserting what one does not have. It is thus
the opposite of presumption, temerity or cheek.
Assertiveness, on the other hand, is often associated with
being aggressive or domineering. As such, it may be a
virtue where people generally do not give due consideration
to others, but it is far from being so where people are
very considerate and willing to allow others not only what
is rightfully theirs, but a little more in addition.

In a Muslim community people are always encouraged to be
kind and generous, morally and materially. The Prophet
makes it a condition of faith that one considers others in
the same way as one considers oneself. He says: “By God! A
person is not a believer unless he loves for his brother
what he loves for himself.” This applies to all situations.
Where a person finds something that he loves to have or
enjoy, he should love that all his brothers and sisters
should have or enjoy the same thing. Thus, selfishness is
reduced within the Muslim community as everyone is
considerate of other people.

This is why Islam stresses the virtue of modesty as it
helps us to keep the selfish tendency down and to stress
the brotherhood of all believers. One does not seek to
stress one’s own position, but rather he considers himself
as part of a greater entity,the Muslim community.The
Prophet even says that modesty is highlighted by earlier
prophets as a virtue to be sought: “Among the words people
received from early prophets are: if you feel no shame,
then do as you wish.” (Related by Al-Bukhari, Abu Dawood,
Ibn Majah, Ahmad and others). It is modesty that makes a
person feel ashamed when he does something wrong. Hence a
person who has no sense of shame is not affected by
people’s reaction to whatever he may do.

In a different Hadith, one of the Prophet’s companions,
Imran ibn Hussayn, mentions: “The Prophet said: ‘Modesty
brings nothing but good.’ A person named Basheer ibn Kaab
said to him: ‘It is written in Al-Hikmah: It is part of
modesty to maintain propriety, and to have inner serenity.’
Imran said to him: ‘I am reporting what God’s Messenger has
said and you speak to me of what is written in your
scroll.’” (Related by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

We need to explain two things here. First is the Prophet’s
statement that modesty brings only what is good. This is
obviously in any situation which does not necessitate
asserting the Islamic point of view or the Islamic rule.
Where these need to be stated and clarified, refraining
from doing so under the pretext of modesty is not to be
condoned. Similarly, choosing not to speak out against some
evil action is closer to cowardice than modesty, and the
two are different. While cowardice is unacceptable by any
standard,modesty is praised in most societies and by all
divine religions.

The other point is the objection the Hadith reporter made
when someone in the audience tried to confirm his statement
by quoting from Al-Hikmah, or the book of wisdom. The
objection is not to what is stated. There is no doubt that
it is correct and in line with Islam. But the person making
the statement appeared to be making a counterstatement,
rather than quoting something in support. It is as though
he was saying: “Oh, yes! This has been said before by
others.” While this may be acceptable when we have a
discussion with colleagues,or between equals,it is not
acceptable when it is in a rejoinder to a Qur’anic or
Hadith text,because it would be putting people’s own
statements on a par with the Qur’an or with the Prophet’s
Hadith,when Hadith is a form of revelation. This is what is
clear from Imran’s, the Prophet’s companion’s, rejoinder:
“I am reporting what God’s Messenger has said and you speak
to me of what is written in your scroll.”

Another Hadith in praise of modesty quotes the Prophet as
saying: “Modesty is part of faith, and faith leads to
heaven; while vulgarity is part of unfaith, and unfaith
leads to hell.” (Related by Al-Bukhari in Al-Adab
Al-Mufrad, Ibn Majah and Al-Hakim).

There are several Hadiths which describe modesty as part of
faith. This means that it is an essential quality of the
believers. A true believer refrains from claiming anything
which does not belong to him. In fact he is hesitant to
claim all that is due to him for fear that he might be
thought of as ill-mannered or presumptive. He is always
ready to forgo something of what is due to him as an act of
goodwill or generosity, or when he feels that forgoing it
serves a better purpose,or pleases others or brings them
happiness. All these qualities are encouraged by faith,
which teaches all virtues and as such leads the faithful to
the right destination in the life to come, i.e. heaven.(you
can read more about this in the book entitled "the
seventy-seven Branches of Faith by Imam Al-Bayhaqi;In
arabic :Shu'ab al-Imam,as abridged by Al-Qazwini.Published
in the UK by The Quilliam Press,ISBN-1-872038-03-4 price
£3.50.

The opposite quality, which is rendered in the Hadith as
vulgarity, includes a range of bad manners, including
vulgar language that demonstrates lack of propriety and
decorum. Needless to say, such a quality encourages
contravening Islamic values and standards. As such it leads
its people to disobey God and His Messenger. When this
becomes a habit, it certainly leads the perpetrator to hell
where he suffers God’s punishment.

Financing the Pilgrimage of Relatives.

Q. Is it permissible to finance the pilgrimage of one’s
parents-in-law if they are poor?

A. Of course it is, and it gives the man or the woman doing
it great reward from God. Needless to say, if the
parents-in-law in this case are poor and cannot afford the
expenses of their pilgrimage, then the duty of pilgrimage
does not apply to them. But if their son-in-law bears the
expenses, he is doing a great act of kindness which is
certain to be rewarded by God.

In fact, the question should not be asked. If you are doing
a kindness to a fellow Muslim, you do not say: “is it
permissible.” All kind gestures are permissible, provided
they do not include something forbidden. A kind action that
enables a person to attend to a great act of worship is
worthy of praise, as well as reward from God.

Having said that, I should explain that if a poor person is
given an offer to cover his or her pilgrimage expenses,
that person need not accept the offer, even though it means
that he or she cannot do the pilgrimage at any time.

Can Woman Wear Gold in Her Feet?

Q.1. Is it permissible for a woman to have her teeth
spaced? Or to use braces? Is it permissible for her to wear
gold in her feet?

Q.2. Is it acceptable to perform the Umarh in the month of
Dul-Qaadah?

Q.3. Are the prayers known as Tasbeeh, and Hajah Sunnah or
innovation? Is it true that the time for evening dhikr
begins after Asr prayer?

A.1. The Prophet (peace be upon him) condemned teeth
spacing as forbidden, because it is an aspect of what
people do to change their physical appearance. Women
normally do this in order to appear more attractive. This
is why Islam does not approve of it, grouping it with other
practices that have the same aim, such as thinning one’s
eyebrows. Braces, on the other hand, aim to correct
something that has gone wrong, or some growth that gives
some discomfort. It is permissible.

The Prophet made wearing gold permissible for Muslim women,
forbidden for Muslim men. Whether gold jewelry is worn as
necklace, pendant, bracelet or in other ways, it is
permissible. However, if a woman wears a gold bracelet in
her leg, to show that she has abundance of jewelry, in
front of less fortunate women, then her behavior may be
extremely questionable. This is determined by her intention
as known to God.

A.2. The Prophet performed the Umrah four times, all of
which were in the month of Dul-Qaadah, but in different
years. So there is nothing wrong with performing it during
that month. People are often confused on this point because
they think that if the Umrah is done in that month, the
pilgrimage becomes obligatory. This is incorrect.

A.3. Tasbeeh prayer does not have a strong basis in the
Sunnah, while the prayer known as Al-Hajah has such a
basis. It means prayer for the fulfillment of a specific
need. There is no special form for this prayer, or a
particular supplication.

The Prophet says: “Whoever performs the ablution, i.e.
wudhu, well and then prays two rak’ahs, attending well to
them, will have his request granted by God, either
immediately or deferred.” (Related by Ahmad) This is an
authentic Hadith which means that we can pray and request
God whatever we want making sure that we will get it.
However, God may decide to defer it in order to give us
something better.

The time of evening dhikr, or glorification and
supplication, starts after Asr prayer, but its range
extends until well into the night

Food Prepared by Non-Muslims.

Q. Is it permissible to eat the food prepared by
non-muslims?Is it forbidden or discouraged?

A. God says in the Qur’an: “The food of the people of
earlier revelations is lawful for you, and your food is
lawful for them.” (5: 5) This means that when food is
prepared by a non-Muslim, it is lawful, unless it contains
what is forbidden. This may be something of what God or His
Messenger have specified to be unlawful for us, such as
pork and carrion, or something that is forbidden for a
reason, such as the way it is slaughtered. But as for the
preparation of the food, this is not an issue.

Umrah on Behalf of Deceased Friend

Q. I did the Umrah for myself a few weeks ago, then I did
it again, but this time I intended it on behalf of my
relative who passed away three months earlier. A friend
told me that this second Umrah is not valid. Please
explain.

A. You have not told me what grounds did your friend
mention for saying that your second Umrah is not valid. You
did it after you had done your obligatory Umrah, so it
should be perfectly valid. You can do the Umrah on behalf
of a deceased relative, and God will, if He so pleases,
credit your Umrah to your relative and reward you
handsomely for your kindly act toward him. I cannot even
try to guess your friend’s reasons, but on the basis of
what you have told me I would say that he is wrong.

Certain Traditional Practices After a Person’s Death.
Q. People who come from certain countries observe certain
traditions after the death of someone in the community. For
example, after the burial, a few dozen people assemble in
the deceased’s home where they take part in reading the
Qur’an in full,each reading a part,and having food. Similar
observations are made on the third day,and every Thursday
for several weeks,and on the 40th day,with food being
placed in the middle. Are these observations Islamic?

A. Unfortunately such traditions have become common in many
Muslim countries, with some variations here or there. They
are mixed with Islamic practices, which are simple and
straightforward. For example, Islam encourages neighbors to
look after the deceased’s family, sparing them the need to
cook or buy food, in the immediate period after their
bereavement.

It also requires neighbors, relatives, friends and the
community at large to offer their condolences to the
deceased’s family, visiting them in the first three days
and when meeting them later. As many people as it is
feasible should take part in the funeral, offering prayers
for the deceased. Afterward, the family of the deceased
should be looked after, with their affairs put on a
reasonably sound footing.

Unfortunately, these requirements have come to be
associated with observations that may appear to be caring
and sympathetic, but are sometimes a burden to the family.
There is no requirement or recommendation to read the
Qur’an in full after the burial, but we may, or indeed
should pray God to bestow His mercy on the deceased and
forgive him or her their sins. Nothing of the traditional
observations you have mentioned on the particular days,
whether Thursdays or 3rd, 10th or 40th day, is recommended
or encouraged by Islam. They are all deviation from Islamic
practice.

A relative may wish to gift the reward of a Qur’anic
recitation to the deceased, or may offer the pilgrimage or
the Umrah or a charitable donation, i.e. sadaqah, to the
deceased. To do so, he does such an action with the clear
intention that he is doing it on the deceased’s behalf and
praying God to credit its reward to the deceased. This can
be done at any time, and in whatever measure the person
doing it finds reasonable.

A recitation of the Qur’an could be one page, or one surah,
or more; it does not have to be the whole of the Qur’an. A
charity could be very small or generous, according to the
person’s means. Such actions may be done at any time, not
necessarily on particular days or anniversaries.

A Common Difficulty

Q. It is a common problem for people who cannot bring their
wives to live with them while they are working abroad to
resort to masturbation as a means to relieve their sexual
urge. People say that it is strictly forbidden. Please
comment.

A. This is the case of countless number of people who are
either unable to marry or, if they are married, are not
living with their wives. They have to deal with their
sexual desire, which God has given us as a means to ensure
the continuity of the human race. When they are troubled,
they resort to masturbation.

Scholars differ on the ruling concerning this habit, with
those taking a very strict view pronouncing it as
forbidden, while others make it permissible in all
situations. Neither attitude is correct, since there is no
clear evidence to support total prohibition or general
permission. The correct view is that all five rulings may
apply in different situations. The five rulings range from
prohibition to obligation, with discouragement,
permissibility and encouragement in between. In the case of
a man living with his wife, with no problem between them,
and nothing to prevent satisfaction of the sexual desire in
the normal way, masturbation is deemed to be strongly
discouraged. It could border on prohibition if the husband
indulges in it too often, so as to fall short of giving his
wife the satisfaction of her desire necessary to help her
to maintain Islamic standards of virtuous morality. In the
case of a person who is unmarried and fears to slip into a
more serious offense, it is encouraged to resort to
masturbation in order to reduce his tension and be able to
think clearly and refrain from what is definitely
forbidden. This could border on obligation if the man
seriously fears that he would commit fornication. In other
cases, which represent the overwhelming majority of
situations, it is permissible, unless it becomes a very
frequent habit which debilitates the man, when it becomes
discouraged, or makrooh.

Having said that, young people are also encouraged to take
measures to reduce the tension created by the need to
control their sexual urge. This could be through keeping
themselves busy, physical exercise, and fasting. The
Prophet tells us: “Young people! Whoever of you is able to
marry should do so. He who cannot may resort to fasting,
for it provides protection.”







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