MR. KNOW-ALL COMES TO TOWN By Baba Galleh Jallow When the great Rhinehart Soberlook surfaced in our little town, apparently from nowhere, we all jumped and danced and gave him a rousing welcome. Unlike our prominent bigwigs, who claim to have smelt a rat in Rhinehart’s handsome face which they claimed reminded them of a camel’s hump, our common townsfolk were particularly excited at the great man’s outward appearance which they thought was just fabs, and after just a little while, at the professed depth of his extensive wisdom on all matters of the world. Clearly, Rhinehart Soberlook was no common guy. This was amply manifested by his immediate establishment of the mighty Jahasay Enterprises, which soon became the wealthiest business concern in our little town. Tales of his legendary business acumen made the rounds and soon surrounded Rhinehart Soberlook with an aura of mystery and sophistication, which sent the heads of our common townsfolk spinning and actually got our prominent bigwigs gaping. Our gentle Rhinehart Soberlook was even more famous for the bottomless depth of his knowledge and the amazing quality of his curriculum vitae. For in addition to his Bachelor of Rats Degree in Prating, Rhinehart Soberlook was the proud holder of a Master of Skins Degree in Bluffing, an Advanced Diploma in Rattling Procedures and to top it all, an advanced Doctorate of Heehawlogy in Sophisticated Cackology. In recognition of his amazing academic achievements, our eminent Rhinehart Soberlook was conferred with an Honorary Doctorate of Slipshody and named Professor Emeritus in Hot Air Procedures by his reputable alma mater, the famous University of No-Truth-Upon-Top. With such a dazzling academic background, it was no wonder that our gentle Rhinehart Soberlook soon came to be known as Mr. Know-All, a title he immediately fell madly in love with and proceeded to prove he was worthy of by delving into long expositions of any topic under the sun he felt inclined to comment on. Our gentle Rhinehart Soberlook professed intimacy with every single subject on the face of the earth, from the fabled three Rs to science, geography, physics and TD. He claimed to have read all the major works in the field of chemistry and physics and was always quick to delve into expositions of the atom and the molecule and give glowing analysis of Newton’s famous law of motion. He would speak so intimately of the father of history that some of our common townsfolk claimed that he was actually a close fried of the great Herodotus. And when you came to the field of philosophy, our learned Mr. Know-All would tell you that in fact at college, they used to call him Plato, Aristotle and even Shakespeare and that in fact, there was this blue-eyed girl who actually insisted that he was Socrates reborn. ‘I did not know what to say to her,’ he would proudly admit, tilting his head, squinting his eyes, and broadly grinning at his audience. ‘Then when I now say that you guys have a lot to learn, some of you will wear frowning faces,’ he would chide. ‘But let me tell you one thing,’ he would generally add, ‘if wisdom was a fruit you could pick on a tree, most of you would be losers.’ Whereas our common townsfolk would break into a rousing round of applause that gave our famous Rhinehart Soberlook even more fire to preach on. _________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- To unsubscribe/subscribe or view archives of postings, go to the Gambia-L Web interface at: http://maelstrom.stjohns.edu/archives/gambia-l.html You may also send subscription requests to [log in to unmask] if you have problems accessing the web interface and remember to write your full name and e-mail address. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------