There was just no end to how far Smoothy's puppet, our famous Jumbo Scifi, alias Mr. Rampant, would go in defending his boss. If it meant going to the skies and back, the gallant Mr. Rampant would do it. If it meant standing on his head all day long and flinging his legs madly in the air, he would do it. If it meant insisting that trees actually grew from their branches and not their roots, our smart Jumbo Scifi would do it just to show what a perfect guy our fat-cheeked Mr. Smoothy was, and of course to please the generous boss. And if it meant insisting that Mr. Smoothy was in fact the only reason the universe was created, Jumbo Scifi would so insist. Kubuga akara Nyemeh Kaneh! Sukurr! Horomsi!

 

By all and every possible means, the glaring reality that Mr. Smoothy was a perfect guy whose actions were all perfect actions must be slammed into the heavy wooden skulls of all those jealous folks who think that they were clever and dared see a speck of dust in the great bosses impeccable character or actions.

 

All hail our gallant Jumbo Scifi, our stupefied common townsfolk used to chant. All hail our learned defender of the pious and the perfect, our heroic slayer of the evil dragons and spirits!! All hail, breaker of the lying tongues, confounder of all untruths, upholder of the perfect truth. All hail, too, our most perfect Mr. Smoothy of the famous Jefjel Enterprises! These were the words that our sharp-tongued and crafty Jumbo Scifi of the
nimble loved to hear.

 

While they were continually baffled at the vigilance with which our sharp-eyed Mr. Rampant gave blanket coverage and defense to the fat-cheeked Mr. Smoothy, our common townsfolk were never in doubt as to the resourcefulness of the great defender of the whole truth. That Jumbo Scifi was a guy of great intellectual resources was amply evident from the tact and clarity with which he broke down, analyzed and irreparably refuted right out of hand, out of mind and out of sight, all allegations and criticisms leveled at the great Mr. Smoothy of Jefjel Enterprises. If he was nothing else, Jumbo Scifi was a dude of all tracks and a master of all. Unlike the fabled Jack of all trades and master of none, it was clear that our gifted Mr. Rampant knew all his stuff upside down, inside out and all the other way around. Talk of fish swimming in the air and birds flying in the deep blue sea and our learned Jumbo Scifi would tell you 'yep, u gat the real fing!!' Baahut! Baahut! Moituko Dafagaw! Yapala!!

 

Our famous Jumbo Scifi was knowledgeable in all fields of human endeavour. You talk of science and he would tell you wait, did you know of Newton's law of motion or the complex nature of electrons and neutrons? Did you know that Mr. Smoothy was actually an expert in the science of flora and fauna? Talk of culture and Jumbo Scifi would tell you wait, did you not know that Mr. Smoothy was actually a perfect paragon of virtue and of culture? Talk of economics and Jumbo Scifi would say hush, why couldn't you see that Mr. Smoothy was a master of both micro- and-macro economics and that he was in fact a microcosm of the global economic macrocosm? How else could Jefjel Enterprises become eternally wealthy in just less than a decade of its founding? Nhu? Talk of human relations and Jumbo Scifi would tell you what? Could you not see that the great Mr. Smoothy had the best PR  in the world and was in fact befriended by all the international bigwigs that mattered in this century? Did you not see the PR sparkle in his eye? The PR note in his gentle voice, which almost sent you dozing? No, you could not be saying that the gentle Mr. Smoothy was no PR guy. Indeed so smart was Mr. Rampant that our common townsfolk always dreamt of him and woke up sweating.