Soffie, No onw would apply but you find out the details of the job after you already have it, so there is no choice in the matter. Forced labour I say. But we love it anyway although sometimes you have to wonder if you will ever survive it. Jabou In a message dated 1/15/04 1:45:44 PM Central Standard Time, [log in to unmask] writes: > > > How many of us would have applied? Hilarious. > > Soffie > > > POSITION: > Mother, Mom, Mama, Mommy > > JOB DESCRIPTION: > Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in > an, often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent > communication and organizational skills and be willing to work > variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and > frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, > including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and > endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not > reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required. > > RESPONSIBILITIES: > The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least > temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue > repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule > and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, > this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying > wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such > as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck > zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate > production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan > and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental > outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an > embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety > testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated > devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the > worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of > the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and > janitorial work throughout the facility. > > POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT &PROMOTION: > Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for > years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your > skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you > > PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE: > None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a > continually exhausting basis. > > WAGES AND COMPENSATION: > Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A > balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption > that college will help them become financially independent. When you > die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this > reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you > could only do more. > > BENEFITS: > While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition > reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; > this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and > free hugs for life if you play your cards right. > > Forward this on to all the Moms you know, in appreciation for > everything they do on a daily basis, and let them know they are > appreciated. > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > To Search in the Gambia-L archives, go to: > http://maelstrom.stjohns.edu/CGI/wa.exe?S1=gambia-l > To contact the List Management, please send an e-mail to: > [log in to unmask] > > To unsubscribe/subscribe or view archives of postings, go to the Gambia-L > Web interface > at: http://maelstrom.stjohns.edu/archives/gambia-l.html > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To Search in the Gambia-L archives, go to: http://maelstrom.stjohns.edu/CGI/wa.exe?S1=gambia-l To contact the List Management, please send an e-mail to: [log in to unmask] To unsubscribe/subscribe or view archives of postings, go to the Gambia-L Web interface at: http://maelstrom.stjohns.edu/archives/gambia-l.html ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~