Subject: | |
From: | |
Reply To: | |
Date: | Sat, 12 Aug 2000 07:51:07 GMT |
Content-Type: | text/plain |
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'You have performed an illegal operation'. Does this sound familiar?
If these were traffic tickets, boy I'll be doing 20 to life!(o-:). Anyway,
See what I've dug out from Microsoft Top Secret Code (o-:|>
/*
TOP SECRET Microsoft(c) Code
Project: Seattle(tm)
Projected release-date: MAY 1998
$History$
*/
#include "win31.h"
#include "win95.h"
#include "evenmore.h"
#include "oldstuff.h"
#include "billrulz.h"
#define INSTALL = HARD
char make_prog_look_big[1600000];
void main()
{
while(!CRASHED)
{
display_copyright_message();
display_bill_rules_message();
do_nothing_loop();
if (first_time_installation)
{
make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
do_nothing_loop();
totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
hang_system();
}
write_something(anything);
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
do_some_stuff();
if (still_not_crashed)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
basically_run_windows_3.1();
do_nothing_loop();
do_nothing_loop();
}
}
if (detect_cache())
disable_cache();
if (fast_cpu())
{
set_wait_states(lots);
set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
set_mouse(action, jumpy);
set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
}
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
printf("Welcome to Windows 98");
if (system_ok())
crash(to_dos_prompt);
else
system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp" O_CREATE);
while(something)
{
sleep(5);
get_user_input();
sleep(5);
act_on_user_input();
sleep(5);
}
create_general_protection_fault();
}
-->
Probable Cause:
yahya_jammeh.vxd(vicious xenodiagnostic devil) in your root_directory
has caused an Invalid Page Fault OD (Over Dose) at memory address
AJJJ000xb0a0nj1ul.
Troubleshooting:
Extract from bunker#1knlai and type fdisk/mbr at c:\> , press ENTER, type
DEL moron_jammeh.dll . Vmm32 file not found! Windows protection. It's now
safe to turn your computer off. WAIT DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!
Error! <;moron !Jemus Virus detected. Abort! Retry! Fail!
Resolution :
Insert your system recovery CD and dump that '1 d 1 0 t'! -->
Mr Makaveli(o-:)
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