My Dear Assan,
             I am so glad to finally hear from you even if it is e-mail. I
thank God everyday for giving you the strenght that you have to face the
pain that has been visited upon your young life. trust me I feel much better
just knowing that you are able to write me.
             I had written you and Malleh earlier and sent it to his
friend's email address. Sigga has however told me that he has started a new
job at Gamtel and that he might not have the time to go check that e-mail. I
would like to know when he has his e-mail account set up at gamtel so I can
communicate with him personally.
             Assan, I don't want you to have any misgivings about my
motivations, emotions, and decisions. I don't ever want to do anything that
would bring you harm and enxiety in any way; not especially now. I will take
into consideration all that you have said and  pray that I will have the
strength if I were ever in your position. Trust me, my decision to leave
school at this time was arrived at after a lot of soul searching and
countless sleepless nights. i have been walking around like a zombie
(walking dead) and going through the motions of everyday life. It's been too
long since the last time I could find any meaning in my everyday life. If it
is me getting my Master's degree that you are worried about, I promise I
will come back to school and even get my Doctorate if I so deem it
neccessary in the future. All my superiors, colleagues, and professors over
here understand and I have a promise of a standing offer to come back and
finish whenever am ready to in the future. At this point, neither my heart
nor my mind is in the work that I am doing. I could go through the motions
of getting my Masters Degree right now but it would be meaningless to me at
the end of the day.
             It used to be that all I had to worry about was whether you
would like the shoes I sent you or whether the clothes would fit you. I used
to hope that i would be able to give you all the things and advantages that
I didn't have growing up. I never had any brother in a position to send me
things and look after and out for me. I wanted to give you all the things I
never had. I wanted you to never have to worry about all those things I had
to go through. Our problem today, however, is much bigger than I could have
ever imagined. Anything that I had ever done or would do is hopelessly
inadequate.
             See, we had a chance to stand up to the authorities in  the
Jawara era and we didn't. That could have averted the present situation.
There was a chance of atleast paying for you and the other boys' medical
fees and keeping you all at least in  Egypt or bringing you to the US, and
we didn't take advantage of it. If only we had paid more attention to the
details and kept a better virgill, the present predicament could have been
avoided. See, it is no longer enough to be simply able to be reactive to
situations that develop, but to be also proactive, visionary, and
anticipative. We must have a concerted effort and and a clear plan of action
for just not now, but also the future.
           Anyone telling me not to leave school would be akin to me telling
you not to do what in your heart you truly belief is right. It would be like
me telling you guys not to stand up against those cowardly thugs who shot
you and your colleagues, or not to go to the aid of your fallen comrades
since you would put yourself in danger.
           I leave you with those words which shall be of no consolation or
healing balm to you, your wounds, and your fallen comrades. If anything, you
are my inspiration.

Your Brother,
Njaga Jagne,
@large for now
In Mississippi.
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